Helping youth to discover the beauty of Lenten sacrifices

Helping youth discover “the whole point” of Lenten practices in order to draw them closer to Jesus in a relationship they yearn for will help them approach those sacrifices authentically, said youth ministers in the Diocese of Baton Rouge.

Catherine Stewart, youth minister and confirmation director at St. George Church in Baton Rouge, said one of the challenges she has observed and talked with youth about is engaging in Lenten practices for the right reason, keeping it from being a competition amongst themselves or against themselves instead of a personal conversion and repentance.

“We’ve talked about how to mitigate this by sometimes not sharing Lenten practices – and by remembering that we’re all in different places and should try to take on different penances or practices in accordance with what we need – not what we always want to do,” Stewart said. “I’ve shared my own story of learning how to accept with humility that the penances and practices I want to do are not always the ones that are good for me to do. And that has helped some of the youth reflect more deeply on their frame of mind when it comes to their own Lenten practices.”

Rachael Johnson, youth minister at St. Margaret Queen of Scotland Church in Albany, said, “We don’t ‘do Lent’ so that we can come out the other end never having failed and having white-knuckled our way through these 40 days in the desert fasting so that we can prove to ourselves and the world that we’re capable of sitting in silence for five more minutes and going without chocolate,” said Johnson. “That is pride.”

“We enter into the desert with Christ so that we can let our attachments to the things of this world fall away and listen as the Lord speaks tenderly to our hearts,” she said. “Lent is not about what we are doing. Lent is about attuning our hearts to the voice of the bridegroom.”

In her experiences. Johnson said teens love spending quiet time with the Lord in eucharastic adoration.

Stewart also finds adoration a popular practice, as well as giving up sweets or social media apps.

“We try to emphasize the need to not only ‘give up’ something but to accompany sacrifice with prayer, that our desire for that which we have denied ourselves can point us instead towards God,” said Stewart.

Retreats are a great way to enter the Lenten season with a focus on deepening one’s relationship with Jesus, according to Monice Oliphant, director of religious formation and youth ministry at St. Isidore Church in Baker.

“(Retreatant) Michael Mullen stopped me to tell me that ‘attending the middle school boys retreat was awesome,’ ” said Oliphant.

Johnson sees the value of peer accompaniment during any season.

“Walking with others in a time of struggle or sacrifice bears the fruit of authentic community, learning prudent vulnerability and accountability to others,” said Johnson.

The youth have inspired her in their radical love for Christ and their desire to spend quiet time with him in adoration and in their hunger to learn all they can about their faith. 

It is important for youth, and everyone, to remember that setbacks and failures are inevitable during Lent, she said.

“We will never be 100% free of sin or setback on this side of heaven,” Johnson said. “In the Lenten season or any season.”

She added, “Do not beat yourself up if you find yourself failing to actually sacrifice what you committed to sacrifice. The Lord’s mercy is new every morning and every moment. It is not about perfection; it is about struggling forward toward more deeply knowing the heart of Jesus and letting him more deeply know yours.”

Stewart agreed, saying,  “We all fall. We all mess up in life and Lenten commitments are no different. Being reminded to give ourselves grace and that it’s never too late to pick it back up can be powerful, as can just the simple reassurance that there’s no failing at Lent.

“Lent is a journey towards Easter, and we will all rejoice on Easter Sunday no matter what. It is good to make Lenten commitments, to take up penances that encourage us in the areas of fasting, prayer and almsgiving; these are fruitful and beautiful. We can’t let a fear of failing, or the actual experience of a setback, keep us from pursuing the perfection of our souls.”

Online resources such as the Hallow app and content and videos from ascensionpress.com can also be helpful.

“Find and lean into the sacraments at your parish; find Mass; find reconciliation; find adoration. Find where Jesus is patiently waiting to tenderly speak to your heart and listen to what he is speaking,” Johnson emphasized. “The Lord wants my heart, and I want his. This Lent, what if I let all else fall away and just gave the Lord what he really wants? How radically different our Easter morning would be if we spent (Lent) offering the Lord our whole hearts along with the prayer, fasting and almsgiving of the season.”

Parents and families can be a big influence of youth’s approach to Lent, according to Oliphant and Stewart.

“The parents are the beacon of light when it comes to faith. Something as simple as eating a meal as a family will make a difference,” said Oliphant. “Other ‘fasting’ –  limiting social media, no phones at the table, help youth watching their parents take the faith seriously is where it begins. I tell parents, ‘We catechists and youth ministers/mentors are trying to instill what children and youth are learning at home.’ ”

“As first catechists parents can help their children and teens on their Lenten walk by first, attending Mass as a family each Sunday, and second, by making Lenten sacrifices and devotions something to do as a family,” added Oliphant.

Emma Rioux, a student in the high school religious education program at St. Isidore, said she realized she was eating too much fast food.

“I gave up fast food and it has made me more aware of what I’m eating. Mom and I are now preparing meals together. Lent has become a family thing,” said Rioux.

And the biggest motivation to approach Lent authentically is the encounter with the risen Lord at Easter.

“I have heard of the Easter Vigil Mass referred to as the Nuptial Night of the church. If this is true, what are we doing to prepare our hearts to meet our crucified and resurrected bridegroom?” said Johnson. “Our God desires mercy over sacrifice and the rending of hearts over the rending of garments. The internal heart over the exterior sacrifice. This is what I want to lean into this Lent.”