Combat Marine veteran John Paul Carville Boulden of Port Royal, South Carolina has braved many intense situations, including being deployed to the Middle East in 2004-2005.
But he never felt the deep pain of loss until his mother, Phyllis, passed away Jan. 14.
Waves of bittersweet grief washing over him as went through her belongings after she passed, he came across her daily missal and in back of it was a letter from long-time family friend Father John Carville.
“Although there was no written date, it must have contained a little suit for me when I was first born,” said Boulden, whom his mother named after Father Carville, and the Paul portion of his name in honor of a friend of his father who had served with him in the Vietnam War.
“I think she had always wanted me to become a priest,” Boulden mused.
He had read some columns online written by Father Carville on The Catholic Commentator website and through an inquiry made via The Commentator, Boulden and Father Carville recently talked by phone. Boulden said he was comforted by hearing Father Carville’s voice.
Boulden grew up in California and Father Carville, who had known Boulden’s family when they lived in the Baton Rouge area, would visit them when in the area of their California home.
When the family moved back to Gonzales, Father Carville, who was serving at St. John the Evangelist Church in Prairieville, was a mentor priest to Boulden. When Father Carville was moved to Christ the King Church and Catholic Center in Baton Rouge, the family would often travel to the LSU campus to attend Mass.
“He was a loving, kind gentleman – what really struck with me was how he supported my mom in friendship,” Boulden said.
Father Carville remembers Phyllis Boulden “had a great sense of humor, giving funny names to everything, including Myrtle, her car.”
Boulden said, “As with most people, my life took unplanned turns and time became measured by the decade instead of the year. I lost touch with Father Carville.”
But Father Carville’s impact stayed with Boulden, so much so he considered a vocation to the priesthood. Father Jeff Bayhi, who served as Director of Vocations to the Diocese of Baton Rouge at that time, helped Boulden in his discernment but celibacy was the issue that ultimately caused him not to enter the seminary.
However, Boulden knew he was called to help people. He earned a Bachelor of Science in psychology from LSU and served as a mental health technician in 1998. In 2006 he graduated with a master’s degree in adult education from the University of Phoenix and served at Beaufort County Detention Center in Beaufort, South Carolina, assisting in reducing the recidivism rate.
In 2013, he earned a master’s degree in human factors, aeronautical science from Embry-Riddle Aeronautical University in Daytona Beach, Florida, focusing on variances in communication within a multi-generational society. He received his master’s degree in counseling from Webster University in Webster Groves, Missouri in 2016. He now has a private practice, Professional Counseling Associates, in Port Royal.
Even during his time with the military, Boulden stayed close to the priesthood, serving as a religious program specialist assistant and body guard for priests.
“As you can tell by my name, the fabric of the priesthood has been part of me all of my life,” said Boulden.
Father Carville caught up with Boulden and consoled him during his mother’s loss during their phone call.
Retired for 11 years, Father Carville has a long history in ministry with families and young adult Catholics largely through his overseas mission work. He began priestly ministry after ordination with seven years at Cathedral Prep School in Baton Rouge as teacher, rector and assistant coach.
He taught for 10 years and served as Academic Dean for four of those at Notre Dame Seminary and Graduate School of Theology in New Orleans. He also taught one course at Loyola University in New Orleans in ethics and one course in medical ethics at LSU.
He also spent some time teaching for the past 15 years at Camps Kadahlea and Chosatonga in North Carolina for boys and girls (ages 8-18), celebrating Mass and counseling.
“I have always enjoyed working as a priest with young people. Their faith is often inspiring. Our graduates from Cathedral Prep still meet monthly for Mass after more than 50 years,” Father Carville said.