Office of Marriage and Family Life receives grant to strengthen marriages

The Office of Marriage and Family Life for the Diocese of Baton Rouge received notice last month it has qualified for a financial grant to strengthen marriages in the diocese over a three-year period.

The $50,000 grant from Catholic Marriages Initiatives Fund, which must be matched by the diocese, is awarded to groups who have demonstrated a plan to create and implement high quality marriage ministries, according to the group’s mission statement. 

About a third of all Catholic marriages end in divorce, according to Pew Research Center, just slightly less than the national average of 35 to 50 percent. Darryl Ducote, director of the Office of Marriage and Family Life, says that most priests, deacons, and the laity know of the problem but aren’t sure how to build stronger marriages.  

“I think the reason why more hasn’t been done before now is that people don’t know what to do,” Ducote said. 

But Ducote has some ideas. As a former social worker with thirty years of experience in marriage counseling and a broad understanding of scientific research on what works and doesn’t in helping to establish strong marriages and to help struggling ones, he and his team have developed a three-prong approach that involves forming a marriage catechumenate program to prepare couples for marriage, providing marriage enrichment for existing marriages, and developing a “first responder” team in parishes for marriages in crisis.  

Currently, couples wishing to marry in the Catholic Church must undergo six months of marriage preparation under the guidance of a priest. Under the new program, inspired by Pope Saint John Paul II’s and Pope Francis, marriage preparation would mimic an RCIA model. That means that marriage preparation would involve several stages in the preparation process. In addition to meetings with the priest or deacon, couples would also meet with sponsor couples who would help them with relationship skills. They would also review videos which present the Church’s understanding of marriage and receive information on Natural Family Planning. The transition from one stage to the next would involve simple ceremonies at Sunday Masses to engage the support of the local parish community. Engaged couples would also be asked to choose a mentor couple, whose marriage they admire, to walk with them through their first year of marriage, meeting and communicating regularly. 

“Marriage is not something they’ll be doing in isolation,” Ducote said. “They will be doing it as part of a Church community.” 

Secondly, the new program would seek to develop enrichment materials for married couples throughout the diocese. And thirdly, the Office of Marriage and Family Life wants to help parishes develop lay ministers equipped and willing to help couples in the midst of crisis or whose marriages are struggling.  

Ducote said his office is working to identify parishes willing to be pilots for the program beginning in the new year.